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After all this time.. Still


We have been together for 4 years
But I am still surprised to discover new versions of him each day..


Today he had shown how bad he could express his anger.
I was honestly really scared, but at the same time I felt like I wanted to protect him.
He was so strong, but so hurt at the same time.
I had never felt the sudden urge to hold & to comfort.
"I am sorry.. All is well. We are alright.."


Yet today he had also shown me how deeply he could love.
I admit I have this problem sometimes to blur out...
Feeling like people would understand my complicated stories;
feeling like my brain is running faster than my ability to restructure words.

Rangga tho' very patiently tried to untangle my words, defining it into correct, understandable sentences.
I called him rude out of my defense.
Then he said, "I want to teach you how to communicate correctly, clearly..
Because I spend my days with you.
And after that (after the wedding), I will be with you everyday."


I have never felt so happy to be reminded again & again that he loves me,
that he wants me to be an essential part of his life :')

Rangga Gandina, I am so grateful that Allah sends such wonderful human-being like you.
I pray that our love would never run dry, will always multiply and never get out of stock.

I wish you would know how I feel right now.



Yours truly,
The sleepless girl with so much butterflies in her tummy

PS: This was written on the day I almost cancelled the wedding 



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